1. a poetry contest
2. numerous games of risk (ergo, i now know everything there is to know about world domination - buy me a drink and we'll talk)
3. a thumb war
4. the romantic affections of all my female instructors (mostly rebuffed)
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8 years ago
2 comments:
Matt you are crazy. I am the ultimate champion because I have to deal with this everyday.
Dear Champion,
I need your advice. About 5 months ago, my wife and I took a flight together. We sat beside each other in the same row, but while I was assigned to boarding zone 1 (the zone for those who prevail), my wife was assigned to boarding zone 7 (the last zone, known in the airline boarding world as the "sucker zone"). A theme song for the many reasons she is appropriately destined to remain in the sucker zone soon followed. Here's an example or two:
I'm the queen bee,
you're the drone
make me some honey,
you're in the sucker zone
I'm gonna sting you
in the sucker zone
Call the doctor
on the phone
you've come down
with the sucker zone
Stay in bed
you're in the sucker done
You gotta fever
in the sucker zone
And the verses go on and on. There's at least 14 of them. At first it was a kind of joke, but now I truly feel there is no hope and she will always be in the sucker zone. I am not sure what to do. Is there anyway that some of my winning championness can help her develop her own?
Signed,
Confused in Las Vegas
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